Calgary, Alberta- An early afternoon lunch of egg salad and chips nearly turned into catastrophe this afternoon.
A new resident to the area had just as soon finished his egg salad sandwich when a familiar feeling rumbled from his belly to his bowels. "I was just finishing my sammich when all of a sudden, I knew I had to poop. Like, THEN. I almost didn't make it to the bathroom." Luckily for the man, his wife and two cats, he DID make it to the bathroom. What happened next can be described only as sick. "So I sat down and...I totally started peeing out my baja. It was bizarre. That must be what my buddy Josh feels like. Always sitting down to pee."
The pooper was also thankful for his reading materials. "It's times like that that you can really appreciate what's printed on the toothpaste tube. And my Stuff magazine. Helps pass the time, y'know?" Apparently one of his cats (identified as Simon) also "kept company" of the man while he went through the neccesary actions.
What did the man learn from this ordeal? He said it best "I probably should have quit after the first sandwich." Amen. Amen.
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1 comment:
Dear Ryan,
That's totally sick. And how could you post something about peeing out your butt and not get a single comment? Your homey's are MESSED up. Also, get a hair cut.
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